Headed home

Well, I cant exactly say that weve enjoyed our time in Korea but we have definitely made some friends that well stay close with hopefully for the rest of our lives. Im headed back to Michigan with Rhylin for the month and Brook will be headed back July 18th. Hes flying into Seattle then driving from Seattle to his home town in Rough and Ready for a day or two. He has to pick up his official driving recprd from the DMV and a few more copies of Rhylins birth certificate for the adoption. He should be headed home on the 20yh. Since he has Layna he cant really stay in a hotel so hell probably just sleep in the car at a rest stop somewhere in Nebraska. Well be apart for three weeks but it wont be so bad. The apartment her is completely empty except for our luggage so theres not much here for Brook to do other than play Planetside 2 which he loves.
Weve got all of the paperwork done that we can so far. Theres quite a few things that we cant do until we have our apartment and a permanent address but were pretty ahead of the game. Now if only we could find an apartment that we like so that we can stop stressing about it.
We also decoded that Dexter isnt quitr suited for our family since hes such a butthead to little kids and all. So he is going to live with Brooks parents in California. Looks like Layna is going to be an only dog for a while.
On a happy note Rhylin pulled herself to standing from sitting today without any help... I cried... shes just getting so big so fast!

Getting down to the nitty gritty

If you've ever even thought about adoption then you are aware of how intense and thought provoking it can be. It is nothing like getting pregnant, do the deed and bam there it is just put it in the oven and wait til the timer goes off (alright I know that there is more to it than that but its more physical than mental). Over the past few months we have talked a lot about how we want to expand our family. We both agreed that eventually we do want to have another biological child, but more than anything, we NEED to adopt. I say need and not want because to want something means more as though its something that would be nice to have but you'll be fine without it. To us we NEED to adopt because its something that we cannot live without doing. Something that we're willing to give up most anything in order to accomplish. There's just a part of both of us that knows that this is what we're supposed to do next. Everyone keeps telling us that we should wait for "the right time". Well I'm here to tell you that there is NEVER a "right time" to do something as life changing as having another child (whether biologically or through adoption). Life will never stop throwing things in your way and its not about waiting until our lives can accommodate adopting a child, its about knowing that we WILL adapt our life in order to adopt. Its not a matter of can or cannot because there is no cannot in this, its a matter of will and will not and we're here to tell you that no matter what happens we WILL adopt, no matter what sacrifices we have to make in order to do so. Anyways... Brook and I have finally decided on an adoption agency to do our home study. It may seem like an easy choice but once you filter through the mountains of reviews online both good and bad and filter out the unethical, for profit, and deceptive agencies there aren't too many too choose from. After we filtered through we found about 8 that we felt good about using. From there we narrowed it down based on cost(adoption is BEYOND expensive), ease of use, and their policies regarding the adoption of two unrelated children at the same time. After staying up until the wee hours of the morning (its the only time that the agencies are open because of the time difference) we found two agencies that fit all of our criteria and told both of them to email us the information so that we could get started. We waited 24 hours and only one of the agencies actually sent us the paperwork. BAM choice made. If an agency can't even send out the application form to us in a timely manner then we definitely don't want them handing all of our time sensitive important documents. So we've decided that we will be using Adoption Makes Family as our home study provider and we are beyond excited. It finally feels like we can start making some progress and getting this ball rolling. Brook and I will be filling out the paperwork when he gets home from work today and sending in our application with the application fee tomorrow. Once they receive our application they will set us up with an online id and we can start uploading our necessary documents. Just to give you an idea here's a list of what we need in order to start our home study. BIRTH CERTIFICATES FOR ADOPTIVE APPLICANTS AND ALL CHILDREN RESIDING WITHIN THE HOME MARRIAGE CERTIFICATE DIVORCE DECREES FOR EITHER ADOPTIVE APPLICANT FOR ALL PREVIOUS MARRIAGES PHYSICIAN'S REPORTS FOR ADOPTIVE APPLICANTS AND ALL OTHER ADULTS AND CHILDREN RESIDING WITHIN THE HOME (ON AGENCY FORM WITH ORIGINAL SIGNATURE). * VERIFICATION OF EMPLOYMENT FOR BOTH ADOPTIVE APPLICANTS (MUST BE ON LETTERHEAD, CONTAIN A SALARY AND AN ORIGINAL SIGNATURE) PAGES ONE AND TWO OF FEDERAL INCOME TAX RETURNS FOR THE TWO PREVIOUS YEARS THREE REFERENCE LETTERS - If you have a child or children in the household attending school, one reference Letter shall be from a teacher, administrator, or counselor employed by the school where the child or children attend. * REPORT OF HOME SANITATION INSPECTION BY THE LOCAL HEALTH DEPARTMENT OR A SANITARIAN LICENSED IN MARYLAND * REPORT OF A HOME FIRE SAFETY INSPECTION OR A STATEMENT INDICATING THE LOCAL FIRE DEPARTMENT WILL NOT COMPLETE THE FIRE SAFETY INSPECTION * AUTHORIZATION TO RELEASE INFORMATION - CHILD ABUSE REGISTRY CLEARANCE FOR ADOPTION APPLICANTS * AUTHORIZATION TO RELEASE INFORMATION - CHILD SUPPORT VERIFICATION FOR ADOPTION APPLICANTS * FINGERPRINT CARDS FOR BOTH CJIS AND FBI MUST HAVE BEEN COMPLETED AND SUBMITTED WITH PAYMENT FOR PROCESSING OF CRIMINAL CLEARANCES BY ADOPTION APPLICANTS AND ALL OTHER ADULTS RESIDING IN THE HOME (VERIFICATION WILL BE RETURNED TO AFI BY CHIS AFTER YOU HAVE BEEN FINGERPRINTED) * CERTIFIED COPY OF THE DRIVING RECORD FROM THE DEPARTMENT OF MOTOR VEHICLE ADMINISTRATION FOR THE ADOPTIVE APPLICANTS and a photocopy of your driver’s license DISCLOSURE REGARDING CRIMINAL CONVICTIONS AND/OR PENDING CHARGES FOR ADOPTION APPLICANTS AND ALL ADULTS RESIDING IN THE HOME * IF EITHER ADOPTIVE APPLICANT IS RESPONSIBLE FOR THE PAYMENT OF CHILD SUPPORT, PLEASE PROVIDE A STATEMENT FROM THE COUNTY CHILD SUPPORT ENFORCEMENT AGENCY SUPERVISING YOUR CHILD SUPPORT PAYMENTS CONFIRMING THAT CHILD SUPPORT PAYMENTS ARE CURRENT AND THAT THERE IS NO ARREARAGE. * IF AN ADOPTIVE APPLICANT MAINTAINS FIREARMS IN THE HOME, PLEASE PROVIDE PHOTOCOPIES OF THE REGISTRATION AND PERMIT FOR EACH FIREARM. IF AN ADOPTIVE APPLICANT MAINTAINS A PET IN THE HOME, PLEASE PROVIDE PHOTOCOPIES OF LICENSE OR REGISTRATION (IF REQUIRED BY STATE LAW OR LOCAL ORDINANCE) AND PROOF OF RABIES VACCINATION. As you can see there really is alot to this... and this is just for the home study. There is even more paperwork that we have to do for the Dossier. Welp that's enough typing, Brook and I have an application to fill out! :D

Daddy's side of the story

And now it's daddy's turn. :)  Starting with the first time I saw Dany, I'll explain my side of the story behind our adoption.  Dany doesn't like to admit this but I remember the first time we saw each other and she doesn't. Win!  I was walking back from the BX and I saw her leaving the dorms.  I was thrown aback thinking "There is no way there is someone this beautiful in my squadron" so I sadly returned to my room expecting to never see her again.  Little did I know that through a common friend, we would be going to comedy night together!  I remember thinking "Awesome, the first time I really talk to her is going to be when she hears me singing an ultra-tacky bar song about boobs." Luckily that was her weak spot!  Even though I had a flight back to America in the morning and had to be at the airport at 5:00 am, she somehow convinced me to stay out in town with her until it was time to leave for the airport.  It was the most miserable exhausting flight of my life, but it was 100% worth every miserable second to have spent an amazing night with my future wife.  After a month of constant texting across the world, I finally came back to her.  The second I saw her face again I knew that this was way more than I could have imagined.  Some people said we moved really fast since we met in July, got married in November, and started trying for our first kid in January, but I say, if you know something is going to be perfect, why postpone it?

That brings me to adoption.  I never really thought about it before Dany brought it up, but from the first time it came up I realized, "How did I not realize that this is perfect for us!?!"  And since I knew it would be perfect, why would we postpone it?  Sure we could wait a few years, waiting for a "better time" to adopt, but we realize that with how involved the process is, and how life-changing it's going to be, there will never be a "best time" to adopt.  We want to do this now, to bring this child(or children) into our home and start our perfect life with them as soon as possible!

Like Dany mentioned before, Rhylin really is perfect and the world could definitely use more of her ;) but with how much love we give her, I know that there are one or two little boys or girls that desperately need that.   I really can't wait for this new addition for our family.  From the second Rhylin was born, I have loved being a father more than anything in the world, and I'm incredibly looking forward to adding to our family as soon as possible.

We chose a homestudy agency, Adoptions Together, and we are just about to submit our application.  This is the first documented step towards adoption, and we are now one step closer to having our even more perfect family!  Wish us luck!

-Brook

This is just the beginning

Here goes...

I'll start by saying that neither my husband or I are religious... so this journey that we are setting out on has ABSOLUTELY NOTHING to do with God calling us to adopt. I understand that many people are Christian and they believe that it is their duty to adopt children who would otherwise be left without families to love them and that is all well and good but that is not us. With that, our 7 month old daughter (who is amazing by the way) is living proof that we are DEFINITELY not infertile... Because of how fast we got pregnant the first time my husband likes to say that his sperm are SUPER SAIYAN (and he would be super proud of me if he knew that I just spelled that the right way without having to look it up). If you are a dork like him then you will know what this means, and if not, well join the club.

So why then are we adopting?

First off, my biological family is beyond wonderful and I wouldn't trade them for anything in the world. But teens will be teens and...
Long story short, when I was in highschool I moved out of my home that I was living in with my mother and began staying with my friend's host family (she was a german exchange student). Well, she went back to Germany and I guess I just never left. They are a HUGE part of why I am who I am today and I am eternally grateful for everything they have done for me. I was in no way an orphan, just a troubled teen who had lost her path and needed someone on the outside to set me straight. The Herrons are a part of my family and forever will be. They are the reason that I have always wanted to adopt.

Fast Forward...
I joined the US Air Force in 2009 after dropping out of college and realizing that waiting tables may pay the bills but it wasn't going to get me anywhere that I wanted to go.

Fast Forward 2.5 more years...
My first duty station was Osan AB, South Korea. Never in a million years did I think that this of all places was where I would meet my forever. Well low and behold one faithful night out at a comedy night at a local bar. He got up on stage with just his guitar and a microphone and sang a song all about boobs. Stick a fork in me I was done. This was it. I'm not sure if its the way he made those motorboating noises or the strum of his guitar but I was in love. He sat down and we started talking, 2 months later we were engaged, a little more than a month later and we were married. I've never been so sure of anything in my life as when I told this man that I would love him until the ends of my days.

Well first comes love, then comes marriage, then comes baby in a baby carriage! Well i'm pretty sure no one uses carriages anymore but you get what I mean. Married in November, started trying to get pregnant in the first week of January (they assured us it would take AT LEAST a year to get pregnant), went in the day after Valentines day with cramps and BAM hey you're pregnant!

WAAAAAAAATTT?

Had a wonderful pregnancy (in comparison to my sister who got pregnant almost exactly the same day as me).. minus the getting fat and having to pee constantly of course. Nine months later and we met the most beautiful little stranger we had ever even imagined. She was (and still is) perfect in every way, even with her explosive diapers and belting out tunes at 2 AM. She is the most beautiful wonderful baby to ever be born (challenge me on this I dare you). We love here to the ends of the earth and back and would do absolutely anything for her.

So you had an easy pregnancy and you have a wonderful daughter... why wouldn't you just have another biological child?

Honestly? Why would we want to bring another child into this world when there are plenty already here who need families like ours to love them and bring them up right... Yea we could make two more children and they would be wonderful and we would love them more than anything... but why not adopt two children who don't have families to hold them and give them attention and love... We may not be able get all of the orphans our of orphanages, and two may seem like nothing in the grand scheme of things, but to us and to those two orphans who we do adopt, it will mean the world!

I'll talk more about the process in my next post, Brook his home!!! WOOOO